I’m 21 Going On 81

A cup of tea, an empty house and three hours of YouTube videos lined up.

We all joke about the stark contrast between you ‘last Friday’ dressed to the nines and out until 3am and ‘this Friday’ where you’re in bed in clothes made just for the house with a shit tonne of food and ready to binge my new-found love of Shane and Ryland.

However, I’ve found myself progressively being more and more happy about avoiding the elusive night out. Ironically enough, as I am typing this I am planning a night out tonight. The idea of everyone else leaving, the house is quiet and me being tucked up in bed is my idea of bliss.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do like going out. I love making plans and actually doing them where I travel, do exciting things and see people I love. But this doesn’t mean I want to do it 24/7. I do resonate with the whole trend of being an “extroverted introvert”. I am happy alone in my room and I’m not adverse to deliberately cancelling plans to do so but I do love going out. I just don’t choose it very much.

This isn’t a shocking revelation for someone to make, of course. It may be considered a bit more of a heavy blow when you take into account that I’m a university student. There is never a more obvious stereotype of us than the idea that we are constantly drinking and out until 4am most nights. I swear if I ever tell anybody ‘I’m tired’ it is just wildly considered that I’ve been drinking. Girl, no. I may have been up until 2am, but that is because I’m binging The Good Place. The other stereotype? That mummy and daddy are funding these drinking expeditions. But that is definitely for another time.

Honestly, the last time I got anywhere near a club was a solid 4 months ago and it didn’t end well. I think I just never really see the fascination with drinking. I don’t see any joy in potentially wiping out the next day, checking your bank account to see you’ve spent £30 and have nothing to show for it and making questionable decisions. Oh my god is it undeniable that some of the funniest and crazy memories have happened to people while they’re out and drinking but all my ‘cherished’ moments in life haven’t exactly occurred that way. Realistically, some of my worst memories also involve alcohol.

The idea of spending £6+ (I do relish the fact that I live in the North so these prices are significantly cheaper than London!) just to get into a club where it is hot, loud, sticky and I’m probably going to be inappropriately touched isn’t my number one way to spend a night. There is nothing like a group of mates screaming and running to dance to your favourite song but, hey, I’d much rather value a coffee date where I got to speak to them more and see how they’re doing.

Again, I love getting dressed up and going out but the same applies to a lovely meal where I have, on max, one or two drinks. I am just unconvinced that going out and getting royally trashed adds any value and happiness to my life that others things don’t/ I’ve tried it and nah, not really for me.

What isn’t fair is comments about people who decide it isn’t for them. There is nothing intrinsically horrific, shocking, or boring about not wanting to drink. Equally, there is also nothing wrong with going out several times a week. People can do as they please when they please. You do you.

So, I think I’ve come to the point where I just accept that I like being in. It isn’t fun to force yourself to go out, just to keep up appearances. I’m not for anybody doing things they don’t want to do, just for the benefit of others. I remember reading a Fashion Slave post like over 2 years ago when I first started reading blogs about a similar topic and she said something I completely agree with… It should just be accepted that you don’t have to send a text out that is a blatant lie, just because you want to cancel plans to go out. It is perfectly cool to say “hey, actually, I want to just spend a night in tonight”. Pizza date? Hell yeah.

So, with my diet coke in hand, I toast you to a happy night in. With no guilty conscience.








  1. March 2, 2018 / 5:40 pm

    Very well said! I’m more of a staying-in gal myself, though not entirely out of choice all of the time. That said, I totally agree that there’s nothing wrong either way – staying in, or going out. Drinking nothing, having one or two, or having several. It’s “each to their own”. You live your own life and make your own choices. There should be no judgement about it. Pass the blanket and put the kettle on – I’m up for a night of Netflix and chocolate! 🙂

  2. March 2, 2018 / 8:36 pm

    I love this so much! I’ve never heard the phrase “extraverted introvert” but that definitely describes me – I’m the exact same. I actually really enjoy going clubbing and dancing, but . . . it’s somewhat rare for me xxx

  3. March 2, 2018 / 9:36 pm

    I’ve always been more partial to staying in myself. I’m also not much of a drinker, which was always news to everyone I met while at uni, and sometimes even now. I always got looks of confusion when I admitted that I didn’t find drinking fun, and I’d rather stay in. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to stay at home and binge watch TV, or go out clubbing, but hey, let’s not judge each other for it right 😀
    Side note, I love The Good Place 🙂

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